From darkness into light

Veteran Lily Mulholland had tried all kinds of interventions. For her, the most effective by far was the Timor Awakening program. 

“Timor Awakening was one of the best experiences of my life. I could not believe the change in my body and my brain after the program,” she says. 

“When I got back home, I felt much, much calmer, and for about six months after, I didn't have any of the nightmares that I usually have.  

“It really changed something inside me and released some of the stuff that I didn't even know I'd been carrying around.” 

Hidden trauma

Lily battled 10 years of mounting, unexplained illnesses before being diagnosed with complex post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). 

“The psychiatrist actually linked it back to my time in East Timor, which was a big shock because I had thoroughly enjoyed the experience,” Lily shares. 

In 1999, just months after joining the Army as a Public Relations Officer, Lily was posted to East Timor – a nation still reeling from conflict with Indonesia. 

“It was very dangerous for the first couple of weeks,” she recalls.  

“But I really enjoyed it. I was doing what I was trained for. I was seeing the power of peacekeeping force as a circuit breaker. 

“I didn't quite understand that the trauma and the difficulties we experienced, compounded by my non-stop postings for the next few years, meant that trauma didn't get processed.

“It had been deep in my body for 20 years, and I just kept getting sicker and sicker.”

Then a friend told her about Timor Awakening. 

Veteran Lily Mulholland

A pathway to healing 

Run by Veterans Care Association (VCA), Timor Awakening aims to help veterans and their families overcome trauma and live fulfilling lives.  

The immersive program runs in Timor-Leste and on the Gold Coast, and is open to all current and ex-serving ADF members, and their partners and close family. Participation is free, thanks to RSL Queensland and other funding partners.  

“Timor Awakening aims to bring people out of darkness and into the light,” VCA President Michael Stone, a former infantry officer, explains. 

VCA President Michael Stone, a former infantry officer

“It was born from the darkness of a number of us that had suffered extreme trauma and mental health challenges. 

“The pathways provided through the conventional system – medicate, isolate, compensate – weren't enough. 

“So, we put together our best efforts to create something unique that would hopefully inspire people and create a safe space for healing.” 

Timor Awakening offers a breadth of support, education and experiences to encourage healing and growth. 

Importantly, the program is peer-led by Defence members, veterans and partners with lived experience. 

“The key strength of Timor Awakening is that it's run by peers who’ve had trauma, who've had serious mental health challenges, and taken on their own personal challenge to move forward,” Michael says.  

“They are role models who show participants that healing is possible.” 

Each program is refined based on past participants’ feedback, which continually highlights the program’s effectiveness.  

“Many participants say, ‘This is the best intervention I've had since I've been ill or since I've left the military’,” Michael says.  

“On the first day, you’ll often see people are guarded, nervous, depressed. At the end of a program, people are having fun and doing activities together.  

“There's a real sense of unity, hope, combined purpose and energy, and that's incredibly healing and effective.” 

Hope and guidance 

Program senior mentor Pete Parton is living proof that Timor Awakening changes lives. 

Program senior mentor Pete Parton, former Army commander and trainer

“I really believe in what the program delivers. That's why I volunteer as a mentor – to give back to the organisation that helped me so much,” the former Army commander and trainer says. 

“The program was a real watershed moment in my life. It gave me a glimmer of hope that I could have a chance at post-traumatic growth, which I'd never heard of before. 

“It allowed me to not only understand how I could better myself, but also gave me some tools to get started.” 

As well as presenting sessions, organising activities and training new mentors, Pete’s main job is to support participants both during and after the program. 

“My role is to get to know the participant and understand what's happening with them at a more in-depth level,” he says. 

“I've mentored veterans; I've mentored partners of veterans; I've mentored adult children of veterans. We need to have the skillset where we can relate to all those different people. 

“We share our vulnerabilities as well, and that's really important for participants to see. We're still growing, we're still dealing with our own issues, but we're making positive changes and not letting those issues control our lives anymore.” 

Being trusted to guide people, and witnessing their transformation, is a “privilege” to Pete. 

“I'm always really astounded by how much somebody's life can change over 10 days,” he says. 

“We've had people come into the program at their lowest point and leave with purpose and ready to move in a positive direction.” 

Holistic care for mind, body and soul 

Lily completed Timor Awakening’s overseas program last year, revisiting Timor-Leste for the first time in 25 years. She says she was so “blown away” by the experience that she signed up for the Gold Coast program. 

While the Timor-Leste program offers an immersive cultural experience (including travel activities, aid projects and engagement with locals), the Gold Coast program focuses more on holistic health education. 

“One of the first lessons we give is that your body is a system,” Pete explains.  

“If one or several of aspects of your life are neglected – be it your health, relationships or mental fitness – then you're not living a fulfilled, purposeful life and you'll probably have issues in those areas.” 

According to Pete, the 10-day, live-in program aims to “model what a good day looks like every day”. 

Held in a peaceful spot by Rainbow Bay Beach, the program combines education, reflection, connection and physical activity. There are open, supportive discussions plus surfing lessons, meditation and organic farming. There are also insightful lessons on the mind-gut connection, growth mindset, moral injury, compassion fatigue, finding your tribe, and other key topics.  

“Compared to Timor-Leste, we do a lot more of the difficult emotional work here, but it's done in a really playful, fun, engaging way. The mentors are just brilliant,” Lily says.

Because we’re all together, we wake up, exercise, eat breakfast, and then do our ‘circle time’ (group discussions) and activities together.

“Lunch is cooked for us; everything's laid on. So, all you have to do is focus on yourself and your wellbeing.

“It's a really amazing opportunity to just take that time out, put yourself first, leave all those worries behind and be with other people who get you.”

The program has given Lily not just practical tools to support her wellbeing, but also hope, direction and a circle of new friends.

“There is nothing like being surrounded by a group of like-minded veterans to help you realise there’s somewhere you belong after you’ve left the ADF,” she says.

“We'll be friends for life now.” 

“Truly life-changing” 

VCA hopes other organisations will adopt a similar approach to the Timor Awakening program so more veterans and their families can benefit. 

Both Pete and Lily have reassuring advice for anyone in the veteran community who’s struggling with their mental health.  

“I can put my hand on my heart and say you'll definitely benefit from it,” Pete says. “Just feel out the programs and have the courage to put in an expression of interest, come along, and be in a space where you’re ready to move forward.” 

“I wish every veteran and their family members could come through this program. It truly is life-changing if you want it to be,” Lily says.

"I think for your mental health, it's a brilliant complement to the more medical approach that we’re also able to access.

“You get something here that you don't get anywhere else: a very safe space to explore your darkest places and bring them a bit into the light, surrounded by people who are just there for you.”